And just in time to give you this little Halloween gift. Come spend a couple of minutes up in the Bronx with me!
More about the film project soon. But for tonight, Happy Halloween! 🎃
https://youtu.be/9OIkmb-O9M0?si=NeSj7lx8P0FDXEvv
Or, “The continuing story of MamaCat Always Has a Plane to Catch”
Here I sit, in my least favorite part of the airport: on the tarmac “for about a half an hour.”
The weather has been hammering the east coast, and there are ever so many flights delayed all over the country. I was very excited to be aboard, 40 minutes ago… when I boarded. I had illusions. Illusions of being home by 1am. Now my connection in Chicago is supposedly delayed until 12:54am. Oh, goody.
But no worries, really. Flight delays are a total pain, but I’m willing to face a little pain for the privilege of being with my VO family. This was my 3rd VOAtlanta, and to call this conference “life changing” is no small claim. It’s also no exaggeration.
I first heard of VOAtlanta back in early 2022, when we were all beginning to come out of the coma. The Covid coma. The pandemic. The shutdowns. I had sustained what I cheerily refer to as my “Tragic Career-Ending Dance Injury” while rehearsing “Menopause the Musical” in Manhattan just six short months before we shut the world down. So personally, I was already six months worth of stir-crazy before everyone else was.
I had stepped away from voiceover as a career focus when I became aware that the so-called school of voiceover where I was on the coaching staff was actually what we in the trade call a “demo mill”. If that phrase makes you think, “puppy mill,” you’re not far from the truth. Just as puppy mills are what we call unscrupulous dog breeders, demo mill is a term used for the unscrupulous folks who decide that a good business plan is ripping off dupes who fall for tales of glory. A fool and his money are soon parted, and a demo mill producer is in the business of parting them.
Say what now??
Let’s say you have recently discovered a love of recording your own voice, and are a little bit “excited & scared” (thank you Sondheim) about maybe trying to do it professionally. So maybe you look up local coaches, try to see there is some sort of training program available. And perhaps you hook up with a program nearby, because the people were nice, welcomed you in, made you feel like a budding talent in a world where you’re needed.
You’d like that, wouldn’t you?
Please, who doesn’t like to be romanced a little??
See, fellow kids, I’d you’re new to the industry — or not in it! — these are the sorts of places which lure you and your money in, praise you too high too fast, give you false hope, cut you a crap demo, and tell you to find your fortune on Fiverr.
And in so doing, they contribute to the degradation of the rates, the business, and the market worth of talent. It cuts our power as a group of independent contractors who control our own businesses and lives.
AND IT’S BASICALLY ANTI-UNION.
All of this made me flee. And I really didn’t do much regarding voiceover as part of my work for years, preferring theatre and film. I actually have a couple of pretty decent quirky roles in feature films! And then came that pesky injury.
So just as thousands of Co-VOs, aka Covid Voiceovers, were flocking to podcasting and voiceover as activities that can be done from home, I was wondering what I was going to do with the rest of my life. And that’s when I found out that three people I know, two of whom I’d coached, were now successful voice actors and were attending this “VO Atlanta” thing. I took a chance, went, and yes, it was a key step in completely changing my life.
So now I’m sitting in a closed bar at Chicago Midway, we’re two hours behind, and all the bars here closed before we landed. Oh, the pain. But the Doritos were good. Anyway… we allegedly board in 35 minutes. To take off at 1:14am.
Next year I hope I have direct flights! 🤣🤔😜
Meow, darlings.
Here I sit in my favorite place: literally any decent airport bar. I’d love to conjure an image of me in my beat-up fedora, a modern-day Katherine Hepburn, long and lean in men’s attire, throwing back shots with the boys. Hardly that. But I do love me some airport bar talk:
“Yeah but you can’t go to every town hall”
“Do you wanna see a picture of my dog?”
“To New York, y’all, let’s get this party started!” (Clink clink 🥂)
They’re on my flight. I totally identify. I’m nursing my customary Airport Bloody Mary, a cocktail I generally reserve for just this occasion. Sumptuous pre-flight tranquilizer, it goes splendidly with my favorite dish, Overpriced Airport Meal.
And awesome conversation. Really lovely people at the bar. Everything was set up for the classic Elle Woods Perfect Day. Nothing standing in my way.
So of course that’s when the thingy thing broke on the aircraft’s thingy thing, and our plane was delayed. Ostensibly, for two hours. And so here I sit, on a different plane at the literal other end of MSP International, a solid 1.25 hours after our alleged departure time. The captain just interrupted “Legally Blonde” to tell us that this new plane just needs a new computer. NBD. Also catering hasn’t made it over here yet. “It’s gonna be… about half a hour,” he says. Just like that nightmare episode of 30 Rock.
So there’s just no telling what time we’ll get into LaGuardia. But a whole bunch more people just boarded. And Elle Woods just got her 179 on her LSAT. Now she & Bruiser Woods are arriving at Harvard. 2001 Boston looks awesome, but I kind of wish we were just a bit closer to looking at 2023 NYC.
IT’S A PERFECT DAAAAAAYY!!
Granny Still Has A Podcast, Y’all! And she’s not afraid to use it.
The goal, of course, was to produce a podcast on the weekly. And we’ll certainly see whether that happens in Season 2. But the first two things I learned about podcasting, once I launched my little thingy, are these:
So today I give you my own twisted take on Mother’s Day, non-sappy, fully produced with an airplane and cheap laughs and everything. It’s a far more problematic holiday than 99% of advertising may lead us to believe. So kick off your shoes, honey. Ain’t nothing Hallmark Channel about this stuff. Let’s have a few laughs, even if a couple of them come out a little rueful. We got this. Hope you like it.
And if you do, please, drop me a line at: grannyhasapodcast@gmail.com
Or, Granny Has A Spring Store for you and she’s not afraid to use it. Glory Hallelujah, at last, a few essentials for your everyday living convenience!
https://my-store-be2758-2.creator-spring.com/listing/diana-wilde-granny-has-a-pod?product=1565
A nice little apron to keep your outfit tidy when you’re whipping up a frenzy in the kitchen.
A little notebook so you have someplace to keep notes Old-School Style, by writing stuff down.
A warm toasty hoodie that’s fashion right for all the cool chicks.
And of course, a coffee cup. Because MamaCat knows you know that #GrannyHasACoffee.
You’ll notice that HusbandCat’s delightful merch is right there for you, too. Go ahead, go nuts. We need the money.
Meow, Darlings. And Stay Offa My Lawn. 
https://my-store-be2758-2.creator-spring.com/listing/diana-wilde-granny-has-a-pod?
Or, I Love You, WordPress and GoDaddy, But It’s not You, It’s Me.
Everybody’s putting their buttons for their Socials on their websites. All the cool kids are doing it. 😎
Cats and kittens, I have websites I built myself and simply love, both here on WordPress and on GoDaddy, and I love them. But they each have completely different “ThingyThings” (technical industry term) for adding the Socials Buttons and I think we may actually have found the point where MamaCat’s head explodes.
It’s just too much more software to learn while starting a business and learning to create all the content and oh yeah Life.🤣🤣🤣 So for large swaths of the past ten months I have been reluctantly searching for the solution to the problem. I keep coming back to, “Hire somebody to move them to either Wix or SquareSpace and stop whining.” Then I go make a fun video or a podcast episode because who wants to research THAT when you’re just trying to have a good time? Exactly.
(Go back to the “trying to start a business” thingy…)
So for those of you who wonder if the old gal has, indeed, learned anything, it’s that I need help with this and that from time to time. This isn’t the first issue I’ve had to ask for help with, of course; a nice man called George Nowick helped me to figure out some mic stuff & pick out new monitor speakers. A nice man called Carl Landau helped me get my podcast onto different platforms. A nice lady called Liisa Lee gives me excellent coaching and is the human who pointed out I need to get my Socials Buttons in order in the first place.
In closing, parishioners, the Lessons for today are:
Now you know everything. Let me know if you need a good voiceover. And let me know if you know somebody who wants to move my domain names at friendly, reasonable B2B rates. 🤣😉
MamaCat says take good care of yourself, and stay offa my lawn!
😎🎙️🎧✌🏻💖😸